During the course of my life, I have swooned over Michael Buble, and my affection for Ben Affleck has been simmering on a low boil for over fifteen years.
And as far as celebrity crushes go, this was about it, until a couple weeks ago.
This new crush came about because I started watching Shameless, which I’m probably not supposed to watch with all the nudity and debauchery and what not, but I do keep watching because I feel like there’s something else for me in that show. I don’t know. I could go on about the redeeming value for me personally as well as the heartwarming moments, and seeing humanity all jacked up, imperfect, unknowing, but also seeing their goodness and not being able to put them in a box. And I could go on about how I think I *should* feel bad or at least embarrassed for watching this show because of my moral compass and belief system, but I don’t. Sometimes I close my eyes or look away but there’s something tucked into the heartbeat and folded between the lines for me. But that’s not really what this post is about.
This post is about my newest celebrity crush, Justin Chatwin.
At this point, you might be like, WHO? Because he’s definitely not Brad Pitt-famous.
Just to make things easy, here he is on the left.
Oh, haaaaayyyy, Justin.
I mean, sure, he’s easy on the eyes, but his real appeal is best witnessed on the screen, not in a snapshot. It’s a charisma, a way about him. In the beginning (and we’re still in the beginning, I’m only half way through season 2), I liked Justin’s character for Emmy Rossum’s character, his love interest. It was all very innocent in a rooting for Ross and Rachel kind of way.
But then I watched a few more episodes and something funny started to happen. He started to remind me of my husband. Minus some big things like grand theft auto, a double life, and lying, but you know, IN OTHER WAYS. Like his unrelenting love, his confidence, his fix-everything capabilities, his make-anything-happen attitude, his over-the-top displays of affection, and his ability to make me laugh. Those are all the reasons I fell in love with Jeremy. And his love interest in the show reminds me of me way back when. Minus the raising five kids and east coast accent, but you know, IN OTHER WAYS.
And that’s what sealed the deal. Watching their love story unfold was little like reliving mine.
It’s confusing because I started to get all jelly in the belly when I’d see him but it was a little like wait, do I like Justin Chatwin or Jimmy/Steve, his character on the show? Or do I just like my husband? I didn’t know.
Is that weird?
I mean I KNOW I like my husband. But the rest is up in the air.
I have never, ever in my life, been smitten with a character. I used to think women who loved characters on shows were weird because it’s liking someone who doesn’t exist. It’s creepy, kind of.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m creepy now.
I’ve been initiated into the club and it’s not my finest moment, I’ll admit it.
But I’ll tell you who is having his finest moment— Justin Chatwin.
And before you get defensive, I’ll have you know Jeremy has his share of celebrity girlfriends as well. Jessica Alba and Emmy Rossum, I’m looking at you two.
Listen, about the sex appeal. Do you think you could just, like, dial it back a little? Can you maybe just stop?
I have a husband, Justin. It can’t be, you and me. Your sexiness on screen is highly inappropriate and really inconsiderate of my feelings.
You understand, don’t you? Take a role as a husband on some 30 minute comedy on some network where they make you keep your playful and passionate displays…and shirts, under control. It’s only fair at this point.
I posted an abbreviated version of this on FB the other day, and my Aunt commented and said “(Justin) is like a girly version of your hubby!” and I was like GREAT SCOTT, she’s right. I knew the character reminded me of Jeremy, but he actually resembles him too.
So then Jeremy commented under my status and said, “He has a big head, little nose, and little body, wtf.”
Because this is what you do when you’re jealous. You tear the other person down.
And I was like, hmmm, I don’t know that I agree with everything he’s pointed out, but in any case this does not bode well for the “Jeremy looks like him” theory.
So instead of defending Justin to my husband, I just started thinking of ways to tear Jessica Alba down and see how he appreciated it.
And I thought, and thought. And then I thought some more.
And I couldn’t come up with anything because Jessica Alba is undeniably gorgeous. And it’s not fair.
So, WHATEVER JEREMY. Take your perfect celebrity crush and get out of my face about mine. The heart wants what the heart wants…and my heart wants you, not Justin.
We are absolutely perfect for each other, don’t you think? Otherwise we would never be able to have these sorts of conversations even in jest.
This is what I tell myself. And I think this is normal—celebrity crushes, that is. It’s all make believe. Nothing is going to happen in real life.
On a serious note, If anyone knows Justin Chatwin, please do NOT send him this post. He can never know I feel this way about him. It will ruin my chances with him forever.
Just kidding, nothing is going to happen in real life, REMEMBER?
…You think he’s into moms with four kids?
I’ll stop. I’ll stop.
But seriously, though.
Related articles across the web